The Puke-Saber

I've got to get me one of these:

It looks like a big flashlight — but it's really a nonlethal weapon designed to make you sick.

Intelligent Optical Systems, Inc., of Torrance, Calif., has been granted a contract by the Department of Homeland Security to develop what it calls the "LED Incapacitator," according to a DHS online newsletter.

The handheld device using light-emitting diodes to emit super-bright pulses of light at rapidly changing wavelengths, causing disorientation, nausea and even vomiting in whomever it's pointed at.

"There's one wavelength that gets everybody," says IOS President Bob Lieberman. "Vlad [IOS top scientist Vladimir Rubtsov] calls it 'the evil color.'"

Just imagine the fun you could have with this. Some idiot in his fancy-schmancy car cuts you off in traffic, so you flash him with the puke-saber and make him barf all over his expensive Corinthian leather seats. It's fun for the whole family!