Clinton Refuses to Come Out of the Closet

I just had to write that headline after reading this story since that's the way the media would have written it had the subject been a Republican:

Hillary Clinton officially declared she's not a lesbian - not that there's anything wrong with that.

During an interview with The Advocate to be published next week, Sean Kennedy, the gay magazine's news and features editor, asked the presidential candidate, "How do you respond to the occasional rumor that you're a lesbian?"

"People say a lot of things about me, so I really don't pay any attention to it," Sen. Clinton (D-N.Y.) replied.

"It's not true, but it is something that I have no control over. People will say what they want to say."

Kennedy told the Daily News he's convinced. "I 100% believe she's a straight, heterosexual woman," he said.

Well, I'm glad we cleared that up. I think to be fair to Mrs. Clinton, from now on I should refer to her as the "non-lesbian Hillary Clinton".