Today's Quick Headlines

I haven't done one of these for awhile. Here are some quick hits on today's headlines:

Clown Told No Giant Shoes Due to 'Health' Concerns
Next thing you know red noses will be out because they offend drunks.

Man Pretending to Fall Off Bridge Actually Falls
Must be a method actor.

Pregnant Woman Hit by Car While Fleeing From Bear
Talk about your bad days.

Geithner to Outline Efforts to Fix Banking System
Say goodbye to the banking system.

100 DAYS: Woman who pleaded to Obama still struggling......
Hope. Change.

Cash-strapped Bronx Zoo evicting hundreds of animals...
Better be careful what you're standing next to in the unemployment line. It might be hungry.

UN envoy: US must prosecute Bush lawyers...
There's been more crime and corruption in the UN than the Bush team could ever have dreamed up.

Dems Refuse to Allow Skeptic to Testify Alongside Gore At Congressional Hearing...
Chicken Little is a big chicken.

Students sick after drinking bottled water...
I'm predicting this will turn out to be mass hysteria, a condition not unknown in junior high schools.

Iraq Progress 'Reversible'
And if the Democrats can do it, they will.

Live Shark Mysteriously Left on Newspaper's Doorstep
Tonight they sleep with the fishes.

WHO: Flu Deaths Could Be Start of Pandemic
I give up, who?

NFL Confirms Talks to Hold Super Bowl in London
Does the NFL realize the game will have to start at midnight in London in order to have a 4pm broadcast in Los Angeles?