Today's Quick Headlines

Some quick hits on today's headlines:

Chavez Slams 'Aggression by U.S. Empire'
What are friends for?

Lead-Tainted Candy From Mexico Recalled in U.S.
I recall that candy. It tasted like lead.

Florida Radio Host Shoots Wife and Dog, Cops Say
Probably just a ratings stunt.

4.4 Earthquake Shakes Southern California
Just another day in paradise.

Chrysler Faces Challenges in Selling Assets to Fiat
Not to mention the challenges of selling cars to Americans.

Officials cancel NYC Cinco de Mayo festival...
No se pueda!

Rev. Jesse Jackson Sued Over Speech No-Show...
If they paid him and he didn't show up, they got a deal.

Iraq to cull boars in Baghdad Zoo to halt flu...
Can we get Congress to cull the bores?

April deadliest month for US in Iraq in 7 months...
Hope. Change. Maybe the bad guys heard we were pulling out.

Berlusconi says he world's most popular leader...
Heresy! We have The One!

Obama calls 'empathy' key to Supreme Court pick
We don't need no stinking Constitution!

Obama To Visit 'AMERICAN IDOL'?
Perhaps 'BIGGEST LOSER' would be a better choice.