Dick Cheney 2012

Some wags on Facebook have created a set of campaign slogans for Dick Cheney should he decide to run for president in 2012:

SLOGANS FOR DICK CHENEY IN 2012
“I know what the hell I’m doing.”
“You’d rather have me on your side than against you.”
“Experience, leadership, normal-sized ears.”
“I shoot my friends in the face with a shotgun. What do you think I’ll do to America’s enemies?”
“I’m what the Mayans predicted.”
“Heart attacks don’t even slow me down.”
“The only time I’ll bow before a foreign leader is in preparation for an uppercut.”
“I already control everything; let’s just make it official.”
“Torturing terrorists may not make reliable intelligence, but does make reliable fun.”
“If I’m busy being president, I won’t have time to eat your children’s souls.”
“Say ‘Go @#$% yourself!’ to the entire world.”
“Vote for me and I’ll consider not strangling this box of puppies.”
“I’ll piledrive a foreign leader before I’ll bow to one.”
“Probably not going to win a Nobel Peace Prize.”
“KSM will get to plead his case to my shotgun.”
“You want a change? How about a president who doesn’t give a rat’s ass what anyone thinks about him.”
“You don’t inaugurate me; you unleash me.”
“I will say, ‘Mr. Ahmadinejad, tear off your own face.’ And he will do as I tell him.”
“Yes we can of whoop ass.” (assist to Lori Z)
UPDATE:
I should mention my favorite from Jim Treacher: “It’s not a smirk. You’re just not worth the attention of my whole face.”

We could do worse in 2012...and probably will.