Your SOTU Viewing Guide

Things to look for:

1. The over/under for the number of times Obama blames Bush is 8.
2. If you take a drink every time Obama says "investment" you'll be unconscious before the end of the first 15 minutes.
3. Expect the TV director to focus a great deal of attention on the Senators attending the SOTU Prom with their dates from the opposite party.  
4. Before the prom is over Chuckie Shumer will get his face slapped.  After a few calls for more government spending he gets a little handsy.
5. Nancy Pelosi will yell out "You Rock!" to make up for the "You Lie!" from last year.
6. Pelosi will be mad as a wet hen at sitting on the floor with the rest of the rubes, but thanks to her Botoxed face we won't be able to tell.
7. The over/under for the number times Obama blames Reagan is 4.
8. The networks will have one camera dedicated to Rep. Joe Wilson in case he goes off again.
9. John Boehner will have a hard time stifling guffaws of laughter as he sits behind Obama.  He may try and sneak in some bunny ears at some point.
10. Joe Biden will frequently lean over and ask Boehner to explain the big words.
11. The over/under for the number of times Obama blames Lincoln is 2.
12. The Supreme Court will be represented by the dying liberals on the court, and maybe the Chief who can't figure out a graceful way to stay home.
13. Charlie Rangel will take $10,000 in bribes without ever leaving his seat.
14. Mrs. Obama will wear a sleeveless dress and will be flexing her guns at Michele Bachman.
15. Obama will continue to push the global warming hoax via a cap-and-tax scheme.  It's simply getting too hard to find more taxes without making up a crisis that requires funding.
16. Obama will provide the pomp, Paul Ryan will explain the circumstances.
17. Rule #1 for sermons and SOTUs:  Both should have a good beginning and a good ending, as close together as possible.  

One thing's for sure, I won't be watching.  I hate these things.  All the silly stand up/sit down, cheer, cheer , cheer nonsense.  I find it far more entertaining to watch my Twitter feeds to see what the pundits are saying.  You can also watch the same lists here:  

• Rick Moore's Political Feed, 
• Rick Moore's Other Feed

And for added entertainment, SOTU Bingo!