Today's Quick Headlines

I haven't done one of these for awhile, so here are some quick hits on today's headlines:

Tenor Gets 2 Years for Raping Nanny, Molesting Girl
I've never trusted tenors.

105-Year-Old Virgin: Not Gettin' It On, Fountain of Youth?
She not only lived longer, but it seemed longer.

Boat on Autopilot Ruins Pier While Driver Grabs Soda
I'll bet the salesman told him it would practically drive itself.

Boy, 4, Growing Second Skeleton
And just in time for Halloween.

Alligator hunts raise questions in South's swamps
Question 1: Where are the alligators?

Buckley’s Son: 'Sorry Dad, I’m Voting for Obama'
Forgive him, father, for he knows not what he does.

Challengers for congressional seat agree to wear lie detector at debate...
The needles will probably snap off in the first 30 seconds.

(Oliver) Stone says no malice intended in Bush film...
Where's the lie detector when you need it?

ACORN Pays to Register Teenager 72 Times
And he probably won't even bother to vote.

Husband Kept Woman Prisoner in Home for 50 Years
I wonder if they're going out for their golden anniversary?

4,000 'dead people' found on voter rolls in Houston...
They're probably just snowbirds who came down from Chicago for the winter.