Hippies Don't Like Wi-Fi

Hey man, what's that buzzing in my head?

Turn off that Wi-Fi network — it's disturbing our chakras.

That's what many residents of Glastonbury, a lovely medieval town turned New Age hub in southwestern England, are demanding the local government do.

Ever since the town's free municipal wireless broadband network went online in May, people have been complaining of, as an online petition puts it, "headaches, dizziness, nausea, severe tiredness, brain fog, disorientation and loss of appetite, loss of balance, inability to concentrate, loss of creativity" — all ailments an examining physician would find it difficult to prove or disprove.

That's not a wi-fi problem, that's just hippie disease. They're all like that.