- The Heathen: He's the guy who doesn't give a crap about the earth, drops his litter wherever he wants, doesn't recycle anything, and feels free to abuse resources at will.
- The Good Citizen: Picks up his trash, recycles the stuff he's supposed to, turns off lights when he's not using them, but still drives whatever car he pleases. Put me in this category.
- The Activist: Picks up other people's trash, recycles with a committed fervency, turns off lights even if he needs them, and buys a Prius because he thinks it will save the planet.
- The Evangelist: Not only does everything The Activist does but lectures you to do the same thing lest you lead to the destruction of the planet. "One Sheet" Sheryl Crow comes to mind with her crazy environmental contract demands.
- The Hypocrite: Says he does everything The Activist does, preaches environmentalism like The Evangelist, but owns multiple mansions that use more energy than your average housing tract and travels the world in his fuel-gulping private jet (see Al Gore).
- The Guilt Tripper: This is the poor sap who has become a devoted convert of The Evangelist. His self-esteem is so small he feels he's personally guilty for the sins of mankind against Mother Gaia and weeps at the thought of oceans rising and swallowing Pacific islands whole. He's a sucker and easily devolves into the more radical element listed below.
- The TV Terrorist: Ever watch Whale Wars on the Animal Planet Channel (owned by Discovery Networks)? A group of radical environmentalists try to stop the Japanese from conducting whaling activities that appear to be legal under international law, whether or not the Sea Shepherd people agree. Their activities border on piracy, but because they can claim the moral high ground they get away with it. Frankly, I don't know why the Japanese don't just sink them.
- The Real Terrorist: See today at the Discover Channel Network headquarters. Someone with an environmental bent finally goes completely off the reservation making crazy demands and taking hostages. He pays for his mental illness with his life.
Wednesday, September 01, 2010
The Evolution of the Eco-Terrorist
Today's incident at Discovery Channel got me to thinking a bit about how someone evolves from your basic heathen to a guy who thinks human babies are filth and tries to take over a cable network. It's a progressive mental illness and goes something like this:
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